Here’s what I know: there are at least five BIG reasons the best-of-the-best get stuck. I introduced number one here and number two here. The third reason is this…

Reason #3: You rose higher than your sense of self would allow you to stay.

Let’s talk about your ego. ;) Your sense of self is your ego. We tend to think when someone has an ego they think too much of themselves but by definition the ego is your sense of self. Your sense of self can be under-inflated, over-inflated, or just right. 

Having an over-inflated ego is dangerous. But having an under-inflated ego isn’t healthy either. 

If your ego is too low you will experience a fractured sense of identity that will cause you to automatically opt out of getting what you want. 

Here’s how:

Your ego is driven by the belief in your heart. Whatever you believe on a heart level your ego will seek to make real to you, whatever the cost. It is like the thermostat of your life, making sure you don’t get hotter or colder than what you believe about yourself. Your ego is constantly working to make sure you do not rise higher or sink lower than your sense of self.

Let’s say that the promotion you worked for finally comes. We will give it a temperature of 70 degrees. Let’s also say your self-image is set at an internal 65 degrees. When you step up to lead in your new role, your ego will automatically turn the AC on to cool your life back down to 65 degrees.

It’s called self-sabotage. 

Jesus said something in Matthew 13:12 that on the surface makes God out to be a tyrant. Check this out:

“Whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them.”

For years I read this scripture wondering why if God is sovereign, why would He take away what I have if I already have so little? Seems harsh.

If we are not careful we will attribute scriptures in the Bible to God that were never about Him. This verse is one of those. Jesus never said it was God doing the giving and taking here. He was talking about the Law of Sowing and Reaping. When we sow any belief, good or bad, it will multiply. If we sow the belief that we are in lack of resources, finances, time or opportunities, we will find a way to destroy even the little resources, finances, time or opportunities we do have.

This is the ego doing its job–making sure we experience equilibrium in life. 

When we have a low sense of self and rise to positions and opportunities that threaten to raise our sense of self higher, we will tear it all down and then some. 

Have you noticed a pattern in your life where, just when the door is finally wide open for you to walk straight into your dream, some sort of disaster or distraction keeps you from going in? If that is your pattern, it's very likely you are self-sabotaging. 

It is tough to admit we are the problem.

Our ego tells us it must be God closing the door on us so we take the next shiny off-ramp that conveniently lowers the barrier of entry so we don’t have to face our low sense of self. 

This is a very destructive off-ramp to take. It is the Blaming God off-ramp, Blaming Him for closing doors when in reality, He put the ball on the tee and all we had to do was swing and knock it out of the park. 

When we are on the Blaming God off-ramp we don’t see the ball is teed up in our favor because our thermostat won’t allow us to see anything beyond our limiting belief about ourselves.

Whenever we blame God He is forced to leave us to our own devices. When left to our own devices, The Law of Sowing and Reaping will work in lock step with our self-sabotage causing us to lose everything, including what we had before we started the journey!

Getting what we want out of life requires that our internal thermostat is set to believe we are up for the challenge, made for it, that it's our time and we already have everything we need for success! If you’re struggling with your sense of self, it's time to review exactly what Jesus died to give you and what is true about your new nature, not your old nature. It’s time to get real about your limitations and ask yourself some questions:

“What do I need to believe about myself in order to recognize my opportunity and take my land?”

“What do I need to believe about God in order to recognize my opportunity and take my land?”

Do some soul-searching and be sure to shoot me an email at christy@christynarsi.com and let me know how it’s going!!

Love y’all so much!

I have always been a driver, renovator, and high-achiever. Until I wasn’t. In 2013 I experienced a nervous breakdown. This was after over a decade of being a disciple of Jesus, reading my Bible and journaling my prayers daily, giving over and above my tithe … all the things.

Until one day I could not function. I couldn't move. It was like I was trying to walk through mud up to my waste. It did not matter what I did, what book I read, what seminar I went to, or how much I sought deliverance. Nothing was moving. 

It’s been over 12 years since that awful time in my life. Hindsight can be 2020, but only if we take the time to reflect on what we’ve been through and tell ourselves the right stories about it.

Here’s what I know: there are five reasons the best of the best get stuck, have a nervous breakdown, a mid-life crisis, a dark night of the soul–whatever you want to call the big, ugly breakdown in your life. I thought we might take a few weeks to walk through each one.

One of five reasons you are not getting what you want is if you are blaming your pain on God.

#1 You are blaming God, refusing to take ownership of where you are at.

Most of us don’t realize we blame God for, well, everything. We call it God’s sovereignty; meaning God can do whatever He wants, whenever He wants. 

But here’s the truth: God can’t do whatever He wants whenever He wants.

God set a boundary for Himself. That boundary is man’s dominion over the earth. Take a look at all the pain and suffering around you. If God was in control of everything, would the world look anything like this?

It wouldn’t. God didn’t do this. We did this.

Am I saying all of our pain is our own fault? No. Some of it is. Some of it is the result of others making evil (or just plain stupid) decisions that had a direct impact on our well-being. 

Regardless of where we are at in life, we have to take responsibility and quit putting the blame on God. Responsibility means “able to respond”.

Job blamed God in order to justify himself. It wasn’t until Job repented of blaming God for allowing all the pain in his life that God was able to restore Job to double the incredible life he had before.

When we say God is allowing pain in our lives we are accusing Him of sinning against us. 

How do I know this? It’s the system of justice God designed:

“Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin.” James 4:17

“But if the watchman see the sword come, and blow not the trumpet, and the people be not warned; if the sword come, and take any person from among them, he is taken away in his iniquity; but his blood will I require at the watchman's hand.” Ezekiel 33:6

According to God’s own system of justice, if He were to see pain coming in our lives’ and not warn us, or refuse to help when it is in His capacity and ability to do so, He would be sinning*.

Religion tells us God allows bad things to happen to good people (Job’s bad theology) because it’s God's way of making us better people. 

I would challenge you to say that to a victim of human trafficking. I would challenge you to say that to the family who lost 11 family members to a mudslide as a result of Hurricane Helene.

And yet this is the narrative of God we give the world in hopes they will believe dedicating their lives’ to Him as a worthwhile endeavor. We don’t present Him as the Good Shepherd who is always trying to prevent danger and problems in our lives.

“For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.” Psalm 91:11-12

Where is this God when we are suffering? He is waiting for us to stop blaming Him for the evil in the world so He can lift us out of the pain we are in and restore to us to a greater life than we’ve ever dreamed possible. 

“Rather, as it is written: “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no heart has imagined, what God has prepared for those who love Him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9

Your rescue plan hasn’t come because you haven't even let it enter your mind yet that quite possibly God is not the one allowing this to happen to you. He won’t violate your belief so as long as you belief He’s left you to suffer for some grand purpose, He can’t rescue you.

I know this can be a hard pill to swallow. But I also know there are many of you reading this now who don’t understand it all just yet but something in your spirit is starting to shift.

The disciples, after questioning whether or not the resurrected Jesus had just walked along the road with Him asked each other, “Were not our hearts burning within us while he talked with us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us?” (Luke 24:32).

Pay attention to your inner landscape. Pay attention to the movements in your heart right now. If something is being stirred up inside of you, the breakthrough you are desperate for might be just one belief about God away.

Let me assure you that the minute I understood God didn’t send my shipwreck or let me shipwreck myself just so He could rescue me, He immediately began to move like I’d never seen before.  The pain started rolling back; the years began to be restored. Physical, financial and emotional healing came quickly.

Life began to flourish and abundance came. I no longer had to live just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I no longer had to convince myself to surrender to someone who was always out to get me. 

I know without a doubt, if you will lean into this, have a teachable spirit and an open heart, you are going to get back on the racetrack you were born for.

Check out these podcasts that will walk you through what the Bible says about this so you can stop the struggle and start healing:

Episode 17 | Profile(d): See Him As He Really Is

Episode 18 | Profile(d): Jonah, A Whale of a Tale and the Real Reason We Run

Love y’all so much!